Monday, March 29, 2010

Tuxbert Pattinswoon

"Forgive me, Blog Gods, for I have sinned.  It's been weeks since my last Robfession."

My poor neglected blog.  It has suffered most parlously whilst I spent all my time travelling untold miles to view Remember Me repeatedly, not to mention the many hours spent devouring every new Rob interview to come out during the movie's promotional campaign.  And to add insult to injury, New Moon was released a mere week later, causing even more time suckage and general blog neglect.  How can one write about Rob's fabulosity when one is so busy simply reveling in it?  (i.e., I was too paralyzed with desire to do anything but drool helplessly for days on end.)

This? killed me dead.  For 2 straight weeks.  I still feel the aftershocks just looking at it.

Remember Me left my area WAY TOO SOON (I could write a whole 'nother post about that injustice,) so recovery was in sight. I even made strides on the now-massive Chapter 11 of "Amnesia." So what did Rob do to derail me? He went and showed up all 19th-century dashing on the set of Bel Ami this week. I always said that man can hang a suit, but damned if he can't fill a top hat as well. 

At the risk of being unseemly, I must exclaim, "UNF!"

This week's set photos have spun my helpless-romantic inclinations into a frenzy of apoplectic lust.  There's just something about stiflingly buttoned-up and heinously handsome Georges DuRob that speaks directly to my still-kicking inner 15-year-old who fell madly in love with Heathcliff in the 10th grade.  And my reply is, "My smelling salts are at the ready and my bodice is begging to be ripped! Take me, Tuxbert Pattinswoon!  Make mad love to me as only a young, virile specimen of manhood can!"

Seriously...this?  This "I will ruin you!" look?  There are no words.

I am spent.  Tuxbert, you have died me.  I was hanging by a thread as it was.  There is no hope for me now. 

On the upside, I am most inspired to finish the next chapter of my also-neglected fic.  Would it be weird to have Edward suddenly show up in tails and a cravat?  Is there some need for another costume party in the near future?  Hmmm...let the lunacy creativity begin. 

P.S.  Rob should figure out a way to make these trousers popular again so he can wear them every day. Commando.

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